I'm asking this in asumption that Y!A community consists of open-minded people with high awareness regarding mental illnesses. Note that I'm not asking this for sympathy but rather just to tone down my curiosity.
Before I am diagnosed with this 'mental illness' (I hate this word actually, I wish we have better term for this), I would never have thought of falling in love with a mentally-ill person. Now that I'm on the other side of the fence, I wonder if anyone would ever fall in love with me? I can imagine how difficult life must be to live with someone like me, and even I can't stand myself sometimes, so how would others?
On the internet I see people pouring their hearts out about having to live with spouse/parent/family member with mental illnesses, and honestly I can understand and I can imagine being in their shoes, because I only started to understand what it's like when I got a mental illness myself. I pity whoever that would be my spouse in the future (if I will ever have one) or even my kids. I want to lead a normal life but I don't want to burden others too, so would it be doing my kids if I don't have them at all at the first place?
Enlighten me, please
(I re-posted this in Mental Health section because I figure there're more people who know better about this here. And yes, I already am seeing a psychiatrist.)
Answer by John Dick
it depends what you look like
Answer by DLS
Mental illnesses are highly genetic. If you have kids, there's a better chance that they're going to get a mental illness too.
That being said, behaviorally, there is no reason you can't have a spouse or kids. You may have episodes, but you are an imperfect human and hopefully your spouse is mature enough to handle them. Depending on what you do, it could traumatize your kids though - but hopefully your spouse would also be able to shield them from it. Most people with mental illnesses become perfectly normal on medications. If you're taking medication and you're stable, why not get married? You need to tell your spouse before things get serious, but if they really like you and see that your episodes are in the past, they won't care. They'll just support you, as if you had diabetes or some other life-long condition. If you are dating someone and they shy away because of your mental illness, the wouldn't be a good spouse anyway.
I know many people with mental illnesses that have families. There's nothing stopping you from that. If you're stable, you won't be a burden. Just do your best at STAYING stable. Having a family is also a good incentive to keep taking your medication and taking care of yourself. It's also a reason to live. I see having a family as being favorable for you, and I'm sure your family would love you despite your flaws. Don't ever think that you can't have a "normal" life because of this one thing. Your mental illness is not YOU as a person, it's just a small part of you that has only a small effect on your life. Don't let it have a bigger effect than it deserves, don't let it completely take over your life and stop you from doing things you want to do. That's not fair to yourself and it's giving the illness far too much credit.
Mental illness will never be seen as something like the flu because the flu is extremely common and almost everyone has had it and can relate. It's more like diabetes - only those that suffer know what it's like, and it's only a small portion of the population.
Answer by MonkeyBoy
I don't see why not. Although I recently got dumped, long story short I believe it all came down to me having Social Anxiety Disorder. We were together for 3 & half years, I loved her with all my heart but I believe in the end she wanted to be with someone more out going and confident.
I guess I still believe that 1 day I can meet someone who understands mental illness and takes me for who I am. I think it just makes the search a lot more difficult.
I also have a friend who was dumped because he told his girlfriend of 12 month that he had terettes (only a mild form where he rolls his eyes and blinks). He wont have a girlfriend now.
I'm 29 and really struggling at the moment to accept this could be how I'm going to be for the rest of my life. I denied I had it for many years until things just got worse and worse. I think though when I learn how to live with myself and cope with things I don't see why I can't find someone to love me.
Answer by Aspire
I think it depends on your illness and how severe it is. I suffer from psychosis and I am starting to realize that I won't be able to have children,because antipsychotics cause harm to the fetus. I know exactly how you feel.
Hi,I did the following:
Orignal From: Would I find love, get married and have kids and normal life like normal people do if I have mental illness?
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