What can I do about an abusive child with psychological issues?

What can I do about an abusive child with psychological issues?My 14 year old daughter is abusive towards me. I know this is really not what people normally hear. There is so much information about what to do when a child is abused, but I'm in a situation where I feel completely stuck. She attacks me physically, verbally, and mentally almost daily. She does this to my boyfriend and her two younger sisters as well but not quite as often. We've called the police somewhere between 50-100 times within the last 2 years, she's been arrested once but that went nowhere. She's been baker-acted around 30 times, she's in a partial admittance at a hospital (where she is there during the day and at home at night) and it's a bunch of red tape and crap to get her into any kind of residential treatment. I've had DCF out here a good 100-200 times and always the fingers are pointed on me. Not only is nobody really doing anything, but they keep pointing fingers at me. It MUST be my fault because children don't abuse their parents. If I ask them to take her they say if they do they'll charge me with neglect and take the other two as well. I feel there is NOTHING I can do and I am forced to just take it. She hits me, pins me down, calls me names, tells me I'm stupid, worthless, and bad and I can't do anything to stop it. Can anyone help me? She has has VARIOUS counselors, she is in partial care at an institution.. which is more serious counseling.. we're in Florida.. she isn't having sex or doing drugs or hanging out with bad crowds.. and she does have discipline and structure but that's part of the problem because she doesn't want it.. she has been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder and bipolar and with traits of antisocial disorder - but she is too young for an actual antisocial diagnosis - she has had a violent streak since she was a toddler but since around hitting puberty it has gotten completely out of control.. the cops say because she has mental problems they can't arrest her because a judge will throw it out.. and the mental health industry says medicine won't work it's behavioral and in a behavioral institute she manipulates the counselors to her wills.. she is pretty strongly medicated but it doesn't really help and they wont adjust it.. they say it won't help because it's behavioral.. she's had several different counselors and psychiatrist.. and nothing..
She is more borderline than bi-polar.. but thank you for the bi-polar advice.. it helps a little.. but the borderline isn't really easily treatable with meds.. that's why her bi-polar meds don't help too much.. only a little.. BPD (borderline personality disorder) is a very difficult illness to deal with.. and I'm not sure how I can keep on dealing with it..

Answer by Pearl L
just kick her out of the house. maybe she'll change when she has to figure out how to live on her own,

Answer by yay1576
If she has a bipolar, her moods are extreme. keep on talking to her, communication is the key. As a psychiatrist treat her, you join her too so that you'll understand how to treat a bipolar patient. Be more open and patient with her. Keep the communication open. Talk to professional counselors, they'll of great help.

Answer by Jimmy J
call the steve wilcos show, they had a 12 y/o boy same think took him to jail, or contact local police and set up an intervincion not sure i spelled that right where she can visit a locall jail
i loved that jailer on steves show "this is my house my rules welcome to hell and i'm the devil" get in this sell now come out not get in this one now turn around face me, i'm not your mom or dad you don't know me but you listen to me don't you!, witch is more then you do for your mom it was a real wakeup call

Answer by Kamakiri
Does she, or did she, act out violently towards anyone other than you and your family? Did she have problems getting along with her peers and teachers at school?

Answer by AikonaterWOT?™
Do you discipline her? I just turned 15 and I would never do this to my mother (or anyone for that matter!), even though I have been diagnosed with severe depression and bipolar. When I was younger (like 5), my mother or father would spank me, put me in time-out, take away one of my favorite toys, or not let me watch tv. Now, I only live with my mother and she will occasionally smack me (not hard enough to leave a bruise or anything), take away my internet, cell phone, or not allow me to leave the house to see my friends or do fun stuff. Basically, taking away things I like or hurting me so I know what I've done is bad and I shouldn't do it again if I don't want to be hurt or have things I like taken away from me. Being a teen, I feel my friends are the only ones who understand me so it upsets me when I can't talk to them. So I used to pull the "I'll just go kill myself then" card. But my mom just threatened me back with she'll take me to HBS (Halifax Behavioral Services; basically a mental hospital). You should also do stuff for her or tell her you love her. IF I was like her, I might hurt my mother if I thought she didn't love me (because hey, if she doesn't love me, why should I love her?). I know she doesn't really deserve stuff from you but it'll show her that you love her (and I hope that you still do love her after all this shit she's put you through, after all, you birthed her). She also may be mad at you for having a boyfriend, feeling like you're replacing her dad (assuming that your boyfriend isn't her father or a father figure that raised her since she was very young). If this is the case, then try to explain to her that things just weren't working with you and her dad and people go their separate ways and it's no ones fault so she shouldn't be blaming you by doing this to you. You could also attempt to talk to her friends and see what's up. If I were mad at my mom to the point I wanted to beat the shit out of her, I would talk to my friends about it, because like I said earlier, it feels like they're the only ones who understand me. I really hope this helps you!

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